ilovelaksa:

ashana:

[quote=\"ilovelaksa\"] My younger dd brought 3 of her fav sweets to school and shared them with her 3 bff.

Wow! She is such a lovely kid! Please do remind her through out her growing up phase!

It's her style lol. I get one purple hacks sweet for my birthday. It's my fav so she gives me one.
She is in P6 btw and hv been sharing the sweets with her bff since P1. She shares 2, 3, 4, 5 sweets depending on the number of bffs she has that yr : )
They are not expensive candies. Ordinary ones from NTUC which she likes.
But that's us la.[/quote]Sweets to us adults are like no big deals. She doesn't share just any sweets, but her fav sweets!! And she make sure all the friends that matter to her has one. Don't you think that is really sweet?! And she gives your fav sweet to you, not just any sweet!! I think she is a very thoughtful girl!

ilovelaksa:

My younger dd brought 3 of her fav sweets to school and shared them with her 3 bff.

Wow! She is such a lovely kid! Please do remind her through out her growing up phase!

limlim:

ashana:

Many parents look simply from the angle of what they can give their children but have forgotten others' children in the class. I feel it is the school that needs to set things right.

The other children stands to benefit from the cake and goodie bags and funz too mah.. :evil:

Guess kids are too young to understand what is \"show off\" and haolian.. maybe it's the parents that worry too much?

I don't think \"show off\" and \"haolian\" should be the concern.

Many parents look simply from the angle of what they can give their children but have forgotten others’ children in the class. I feel it is the school that needs to set things right.

hercules:

Hi Ashana,


Thanks for sharing about your mum.

My late mum is someone similar - selfless and thrifty yet generous towards those poorer/weaker than her despite not well to do. People used to call her 'stupid' but from young, I adored her as my life's greatest idol. She was illiterate but lived a life of righteousness based on what her mum (my grand mum) had demonstrated to her no matter what others said.

My late mum left behind about $5,000 for her children and grandchildren, but the priceless thing is the legacy of altruism that we inherited that I do want to pass on to my kids.

Cheers to great mothers!

Thanks for sharing that! I would respect your mum if I know her too!

The greatest legacy one can pass on to one's children and grandchildren is not money or other material things accumulated in one's life, but rather a legacy of character and faith. -- Billy Graham

My mum takes after her father. My grandpa always say you can have it, but does not mean you are entitled to it. I believe my grandpa has successfully imprint this in her life. LOL!

littleprince:

Hi Ashana,


You have a very lovely mum and in turn you have benefited from her teachings (indirectly).
I am sure that as long as you remain positive and pass on these teachings to your child, she will also pick up these positive traits.

I always tell my hubby that it is no coincidence that our friends' kids all turn up to be mini people of their parents. It is what you teach and show by example on a daily basis that they become influenced without themselves even noticing. Don't worry, just stay positive and continue to do what you do.

Thanks littleprince. I'm a new parent and a not so confident parent. I do hope someday when my child look back, she can regard what she picked up from me as something valuable to her life.

Thanks all for the time taken to share your thoughts on this.


I reckoned many has shared from different angles

- Is Birthday Celebrations for kids necessary
- Is Birthday Celebrations in CC necessary
- Birthday Celebrations by invitations to venues outside of school
- The scale of Birthday celebrations
- The scale of Birthday celebrations in school
- The scale of Birthday celebrations out of school
- How extravagant is extravagant
- Kid’s intentions and reactions towards Birthdays Celebrations
- Parents’ intentions and reactions toward birthdays celebrations
- Principal’s Teachers’ intentions and reactions towards Birthdays celebrations
- etc etc


I have no qualm about how parents celebrate their kids’ birthdays. They can do it in any scale and as often as they like to their heart’s content. I don’t really bother or think along this line.

My uneasiness arise from celebrating Birthdays in CC. If I can decide, I’ll say no to birthday celebrations in school, regardless scale.

However, if celebration is restricted to a brief affair with birthday cake, birthday song and a goodie bag I am ok with the idea of it. I assume such school will make it look like a usual tea break with cake-cutting and a happy birthday song. They won’t make a big hoo ha out of it.

What I don’t welcome is the idea of turning individual birthday celebration to a big event in preschool. Many parents mentioned if you don’t like to do it, just don’t and I agreed with you too.

Many mentioned about affordability. I have not much concerns in this aspect. I believe preschoolers don’t see things as expensive or cheap unless the adults tell them or make it an important task to show them. Whether parents have this aspect of control largely depend on the environment they exposed their kids to. You can throw the grandest party for your child, buy the most expensive gift, if you don’t make a big deal out of it, your child wouldn’t attach it with cost. That is parent’s responsibility.

However, if a child is in the environment where everyone around is talking about grand birthday parties every other week, the child will soon grasp the idea of what money can buy. Preschoolers don’t talk about news, dramas, homework stress, family problems, relationship problems right?

My concern, if preschool allows an individual’s birthday celebration to this extend, it makes me questions the values they can taught in the younger generation. Is a birthday, only a birthday, why does school allows it to be such a grand and important affair that everybody has to set way for you?! Just because it is your birthday? I personally shunned the idea of my child feeling entitled to anything just because she can have it. At preschool age is birthday, it is not difficult to deal with, but such entitlement will grow to something else.

At the same time, I’m questioning, many parents mentioned the kids have no recollections of their preschool birthday celebrations. If birthday celebrations have no special meaning to preschoolers nor can they remember how and who they celebrated with, so who is it actually for? Shouldn’t a preschool consider that too?

Anyway, perhaps I have blind faith, I have never expected this from a preschool. When I look for a preschool, my main concern is the environment, curriculum, convenience and I didn’t check if and how they celebrate birthdays in school! I believe I’ll have to do it from now on which I do find it quite amusing.

There are many parenting styles, many types of loves and different expectations for their children. No child the same. No parent the same. No style is right or wrong. I just want my child’s early life to be as simplest as possible. This is the only time she can experience the simplicity in life. I won’t be with her forever.

Thanks all for your time to share your thoughts. It allows me to look at things from different perspectives. Truly appreciate it.

:lovesite:

Funz:

ashana:

It just occurred to me after reading some posts, will the teachers look at kids differently based on the scale of events that the parents throw?

There are all sorts of people aren't there?

But why think along such negative lines? If there are teachers who think like that, I would like to think that they are the minority. Do preschool teachers have such a bad rep or are regarded so lowly that, that is the train of thoughts that people hop on? That teachers judge kids base on their parents' affluence or willingness to spend?

Thanks for affirming that. I have full respect on the profession of preschool teachers. It just occurred to me after reading some posts and I wonder how the parents here see that.

It just occurred to me after reading some posts, will the teachers look at kids differently based on the scale of events that the parents throw?