Child Maintenance - Advise Needed...

[Merlion]

You can also go to see your MP in your area and tell him / her about your problems. Usually they will help you to write a letter to court and that will speed up the process.

[Fluffy]

My gf was joking to me the other day that she maintains the kids tuition/enrichment classes and kept all receipts of kids expenditures just in case the marriage break down. The reason is her ex-colleague whose husband committed adultury was advised by the lawyer to maintain and increase the children’s expenditures during separation so that upon completion of divorce and settlement of alimony etc, the court would take into account the husband’s income and the family expenditures.


Another of my gf quietly kepts copies of her husband’s pay slip, income tax assessment and credit card bills after she accidentally discovered her husband’s adulterous acts. Some man became very irresponsible when the marriage broke down. I feel for most of the wives who is SAHM and do not have their own income.

Since I stopped working full time, I have very little income. Fortunately, my husband trusted me to handle all the family finances due to my qualification and experiences. In fact, he is not fully aware of his income level and have to depend on me for cash as he never bother to learn and use the ATM machine. I am sometimes appalled at the notion that many of my SAHM gfs do not know their husband’s income and they have to beg for every single cents they spend on their children and themselves. I also know of SAHM upon sudden death of husband was at loss of the family financial situation and assets of husband was frozen due to debts incurred and 2nd family from overseas claiming the estate.

I plead with all women out there to be fully involved in the family’s financial situation because you never known when you have to handle the family without your husband around. Make sure you keep some rainy days account for emergency use.

[fussyMummy]

Last time he bought all the debts documents to court and that person in charge at court asked me why so cure to ask $ from ex again???? (My ex is a gamble, owe a lot of Credit Cards $$) I nearly \"whack\" that person.. haha.. so violet right?



Currently I applied for maintance at court.... But my ex never attend it. So I paid another $10 for 2nd processing fee... and yet he never attend..... then court passed this case to police......... and asked me to call up if no result after 2 months..... ? :?

I wasted 2 annual leave just because of it... and the maintance should be pay on Jul09..... ! Now already Oct 09.....already \"eat wind\" lor....


I really dont understand.......!? Maybe what I can do.. is wait .. & wait

[leesf]

[quote]I plead with all women out there to be fully involved in the family's financial situation because you never known when you have to handle the family without your husband around. Make sure you keep some rainy days account for emergency use.[/quote]

Sometimes its not that women do not want to be involved in the family's financial situation but the hb is the one who do not let the wife handle the home finance. My hb is one of them. He said he will not be a man anymore if he let me in charge of family's financial situation. When I ask for increment for home allowance of $100 he asks me why. As he paid for my hp phone bill & when it exceeded the max. limit, again he questions me even though it exceeded by about $17+. But he is very generous when treating his customers. So I will claim every single cent from him if necessary. Sometimes I just feel I am begging him for the home allowance. Can't imagine if I the marriage breaks down & I need to claim maintenance from him........

[cakhcakh]

If your income is less than $ 1200, suggest you go to legal aid and get them to represent you. The judge are more lenient to the mother who is the care giver of the child. Further woman are protected by woman charter rights. You need to list down all yr child expenses only the essential. Ultimately, the child is carrying yr ex-hubby surname by all rights he shld bear the responsibility for the cost to raise the child up. DO NOT give him any chance to escape from his responsibility. For all you know, he may be remarried and providing for the new wife and new child. These men are real idiot, when dating and early marriage say what is his is mine and what is yrs is mine. Now, expect woman to bear all the hardship and raising up the child. Woman hv to suffer 9mos of pregnancy not to mention labour pain. Some men cant even bear the sight of blood not to mention sharing the labour pain.

[ScNjK]

Hi mummies,


May i check with you what are the things that can / should be included in the maintenance fee besides the following pls :-

Child

> food
(i've no idea how much to put cos we often eat at my mum house :frustrated: )
> transport
> school fees
> courses

How about clothes and toys huh? Do i have to include?

Myself

> food (also no idea )
> transport (always take cab when no car.. Like that a bit too much right?)

, loss... & clueless...

[ScNjK]

Hi Insider,


Sorry to ask but is it convenient to talk to you over the phone as my appt with the lawyer is tomorrow.. I still have another question and hope you can enlighten me.. Sorry for asking so much..

I'll pm you my mobile no. If you are convenient, i hope you can call me ok?

Sorry... Sorry... Very paiseh to trouble you.. :imsorry:

[starlight1968sg]

GIRO is never fool-proof. What if he does not deposit $$ into that a/c? Still get no $$ right?


I agree the law must be flexible; it seems that the law protects women more than men. But what if the woman commits a crime or stray? Men suffer for nothing?

[ScNjK]

Hi mummies,


I wonder if you know whether if there's any difference if the divorce was file under

(1) adultery
(2) can't get along

Will it affect the child custody?

[fussyMummy]

starlight1968sg:

GIRO is never fool-proof. What if he does not deposit $$ into that a/c? Still get no $$ right?


I agree the law must be flexible; it seems that the law protects women more than men. But what if the woman commits a crime or stray? Men suffer for nothing?

Hi Starlight1968sg,

Seems that the law protects women more than men... it seems like only.
For my own case, I asked for maintanace since July 2009, and till now, not even single cent I get but wasted my time attended to the Family Court more than 3 times. Warrant of Arrest Case since Aug 09 as my ex never appear at court, but then the only thing I can do is WAIT for the outcome.... after I called the particular section many times.

I just dont understand what is the laws mean to? sorry to say that...

For a failure marriage, both parties need to take responsibility on it.... Nowsadays there are a lot of divorce cases due to wife is having affairs.. Couple nowsadays is lack of communication or there are too much \"sources\" to let oneself easily to get into affairs or... I dont dare to comment, as all \"take 2 hands to clap\"..

Whatever is........ the innocent parties who get hurt but dont have any right to choose : children