PM Lee: What future do you want for Singapore?

[Daddy D]

I like the part where the Indian guy spoke as a parent, and encourage the young/singles to talk to their parents... (about the alternative lifestyle)...


Think most parents will \"gek sim\"... After giving the kids all the best (toys, clothes, holidays, education, etc)... :faint:

Somehow something went wrong somewhere? (e.g. Parents stop doing their parenting roles?) :yikes:

[Funz]

If for some reason I cannot find someone whom I feel I can spend the rest of my life with, does that mean I can never have kids? I at one point did entertain the thought of not marrying but having kids. That line of thinking most probably gave my parents a near heart attack.


While I do believe that a child needs both father and mother in his/her life, I do not think father and mother can be in his/her life only if they are married.

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

[corneyAmber]

Funz:

If for some reason I cannot find someone whom I feel I can spend the rest of my life with, does that mean I can never have kids? I at one point did entertain the thought of not marrying but having kids. That line of thinking most probably gave my parents a near heart attack.


While I do believe that a child needs both father and mother in his/her life, I do not think father and mother can be in his/her life only if they are married.

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

:? Why is it deemed as a penalty? Then is it a penalty for the child to be born without a father? :scratchhead:

[limlim]

Funz:

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

What type of person would be able to have kids and bring up the kids alone?

If they are reasonably well-off.. then, I don't see what is the problem they face? I suppose they do not need any help from the govt at all.. And they are free to hv all the kids they want.. there's no stopping them.. right?

[fightingmom]

limlim:

Funz:

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

What type of person would be able to have kids and bring up the kids alone?

If they are reasonably well-off.. then, I don't see what is the problem they face? I suppose they do not need any help from the govt at all.. And they are free to hv all the kids they want.. there's no stopping them.. right?

Ah...I see a potential debate topic here ! :rahrah:

[Funz]

ksi:

Funz:

If for some reason I cannot find someone whom I feel I can spend the rest of my life with, does that mean I can never have kids? I at one point did entertain the thought of not marrying but having kids. That line of thinking most probably gave my parents a near heart attack.


While I do believe that a child needs both father and mother in his/her life, I do not think father and mother can be in his/her life only if they are married.

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

:? Why is it deemed as a penalty? Then is it a penalty for the child to be born without a father? :scratchhead:

Don't understand your 2nd question. Why would the child be without a father? Married or not, the man who contributed the sperm is the father.

Maybe like what that Indranee fella said, the govt did not set out to discriminate against unmarried parents but to encourage married couples. I however am of the thinking if the policies are to support child rearing, it should be for that, regardless of marital status.

[Funz]

fightingmom:

limlim:

[quote=\"Funz\"]

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

What type of person would be able to have kids and bring up the kids alone?

If they are reasonably well-off.. then, I don't see what is the problem they face? I suppose they do not need any help from the govt at all.. And they are free to hv all the kids they want.. there's no stopping them.. right?

Ah...I see a potential debate topic here ! :rahrah:[/quote]Yah boy, another topic for debate.

Why only the reasonably well off can have kids alone? If thinking along that line, only reasonably well off couples should have kids too?

[corneyAmber]

Funz:

ksi:

[quote=\"Funz\"]If for some reason I cannot find someone whom I feel I can spend the rest of my life with, does that mean I can never have kids? I at one point did entertain the thought of not marrying but having kids. That line of thinking most probably gave my parents a near heart attack.


While I do believe that a child needs both father and mother in his/her life, I do not think father and mother can be in his/her life only if they are married.

Of course the norm of finding someone, getting married then having kids should be encouraged but I think if a person is able and want to have kids though not married, they should not be penalised for that choice.

:? Why is it deemed as a penalty? Then is it a penalty for the child to be born without a father? :scratchhead:

Don't understand your 2nd question. Why would the child be without a father? Married or not, the man who contributed the sperm is the father.

Maybe like what that Indranee fella said, the govt did not set out to discriminate against unmarried parents but to encourage married couples. I however am of the thinking if the policies are to support child rearing, it should be for that, regardless of marital status.[/quote]Just contributing sperm is a father? :scratchhead: How about those from sperm bank? Most likely if one cannot find someone to marry will seek help from sperm bank. Which man will contribute sperm to a woman he does not want to marry but only want to sleep with? What if one day he decides to get married to someone else, won't he be complicating his life? Sleep yes, contribute sperm? errrr....I don't think men are naive leh.... And from the macro level, what kind of society is this? legally rojak... I know now it is already happening with the EMAs and all ....but endorsing and not endorsing formally does make a major difference to a society make-up. So is the child penalised then, can the child say no? Food for thought.

[Funz]

ksi:

Funz:

Don't understand your 2nd question. Why would the child be without a father? Married or not, the man who contributed the sperm is the father.


Maybe like what that Indranee fella said, the govt did not set out to discriminate against unmarried parents but to encourage married couples. I however am of the thinking if the policies are to support child rearing, it should be for that, regardless of marital status.

Just contributing sperm is a father? :scratchhead: How about those from sperm bank? Most likely if one cannot find someone to marry will seek help from sperm bank. Which man will contribute sperm to a woman he does not want to marry but only want to sleep with? What if one day he decides to get married to someone else, won't he be complicating his life? Sleep yes, contribute sperm? errrr....I don't think men are naive leh.... And from the macro level, what kind of society is this? legally rojak... I know now it is already happening with the EMAs and all ....but endorsing and not endorsing formally does make a major difference to a society make-up. So is the child penalised then, can the child say no? Food for thought.

Like it or not, biologically speaking yup. Legally speaking in terms of commitment, different ballgame altogether. Whether or not the father plays a role in the child's life, is for the people involved to hash out. Accidents do happen, we all know that. The scenario of a man fathering a child out of wedlock deciding to get married eventually to someone else, that is already happening. Couples divorce and remarry, etc. This is real life.

I am not saying to endorse. The deterring factor should be societal norms, not policies. Policies to support child rearing should be just that, support regardless of whether the child is born out of wedlock or not.

[Lilac66]

Funz:

. The deterring factor should be societal norms, not policies. .

But policies do influence societal norms. Imagine if our govr goes ahead with gays marriage, won't it slowly evolve into a norm?