Is okay say no to Ipad/Iphone?

[ammonite]

For me, amount of exposure depends on amount of supervision I am willing to provide. Current exposure is very limited and my p2 boy is not interested. Right now I talk to him about stranger danger and Internet safety/bullying whenever the opportunity arises. Many of my relatives have Facebook account for their children even though they are underaged. My children do not have them, and I have told them they should NOT put their addresses online. Good friends will know how to contact them. Friends who are not close do not need to know them. Strangers should not have them. This is my most basic rule. I think they should know the rules before, and not only after they start using social media.


Personally I will not change how I raise my kids just because Psle format is changing... No offense intended. anyway Internet lingo is mostly shorthand,I don't see how it will improve their English!

[joyceharper]

I was just talking to another dad the other day. He’s Australian and he was just talking about how all this technology is more than just whether or not kids are properly occupied. He made an interesting point on how if for example, your son/daughter wants an iPhone 5 because it just launched. You tell them no because you feel that it is expensive and they are too young to be owning such an expensive phone. Then they say "what if I work for it?" and you think that that might be a good idea because it will teach them responsibility.


However, there are other factors that come into play. If, for example, he/she really does work and earns money and buys the phone. The lesson he/she could have learned is that he/she works to earn money so they can buy things. Those are still wrong values. Because it will only progress into materialism. They could work to buy a car, a house, date their significant other in expensive restaurants, travel on holidays – but they may not learn how to save or invest or give.

I never saw it that way, but it made me really think about this topic.

[janmumtham]

I said no to mine because I can’t afford it. They understand.

[SBKS]

beanbear:

I believe in cultivating self-control. Gadgets in themselves are not bad. Whether the gadget is TV, computers, ipad, iphone or whatever. It's about how much time you spend on these stuff.


I prefer to teach my kids about limiting their exposure to any kinds of gadgets. One day, our kids will stop asking us for permission to do things. When that time comes, I hope the training they have received early on about setting self-limits will kick in and they know what's reasonable amount of time to spend on things that are pleasurable and to discern when they have have spent too much time on pleasurable things that take you away from things that are important.

Too much deprivation can cause a child to crave and long for it. I won't be able to stop my child's friends from giving my child the exposure. Hence I prefer that my children are exposed to gadgets under my watchful eye.

I've seen my friends kids who are overly deprived and they go overboard or try to do things secretly when they are under too strict controls. When the parents find out, they realize the child has been too suppressed.

For eg, my kids get 30mins TV each day but 45 mins of playground where they get physical activity. They only get to play ipad or phone games on weekends and that's also limited to 30mins. They only get to play Wii during the June holidays and during that time, it's also limited to 45mins per session 2-3 times a week.

All my gadgets are within easy reach, no need for lock and key but my children do not touch them even when I'm not at home. I've trained them to always ask for permission if they want to play the computer or ipad. I'm glad to say after the early years of training, my kids are aware of what the limitations are. They put on the Timer when they are watching TV or using gadgets and switch off once the timer is off. Siblings mutually monitor each other. When one kid breaks the rule, they report to me. Kids get punished and they learn their lesson.

I've shown them newspaper articles about teenage cyber addictions that's led to death and talked to them many times about the importance of self-discipline whether it's food, games or whatever. It's about moderation and choosing your limits. I talk about trust too. The more they demonstrate they are able to follow the limits, the more freedom they will be given.

:goodpost: :goodpost: :goodpost:

its everything in moderation...not just gadgets....food, time, sleep. all in moderation.

back to topic...technology is something we should embrace and not detest. everything comes with pros and cons. it's up to us to differentiate the pros and the cons.

I also hope I can achieve the same results as beanbear. :xedfingers:

and 1 more point to remind everyone. our kids, given a choice, would definitely choose a LIVE person than a computer to interact with. then why would some choose computer? its because they don't find us parents more interesting as compare to the electronic board.

So for those whose kids are sticky on gadgets, better start doing something with them or spend more time with them. the beginning is always hard...keep it up.... :rahrah:

[bellymummy]

Yes it is. I usually do not use rewards as a temptation for my kids to score better. If they want an ipad or iphone, they have to earn it through helping me run errands or when its birthday or christmas. Its their father way of doing things. haha