How to train DD to be gentle?

[seekingangels]

It actually works! But it feels so upsetting that she would behave so rough with me and so gentle with her dad… it almost feels like she dislikes me.

[clonob]

Seeking angels, maybe u can try spending more time with your child and see whether this works?

[celebratelife]

clonob:

I find my 17 months DD quite rough in her movements and the way she handle things. Lots of her books were either torn or crumpled (even with board book ). And today she walked like a gangster, with shoulders and hands swaying while walking (wonder where she learnt that out of the blue)!


How can I train her to be gentle? Please help! :?:

Dear clonob,

Gentleness usually arises from a state of mind. And materialises in the form of physical movements and behaviour. Inculcating the right values might help in the long-term basis. Two useful values are:

1. Compassion

2. Gratitude

If a children develop compassion towards others, they will usually be gentle - in her thoughts, speech and actions. And if children appreciate the things around them, they will be gentle towards them too.

For the practice of compassion, children can be taught to understand that all living things want to be respected and loved, just like them. Over time, this mutual understanding between others and themselves will manifest in their love for others. Gentleness in their mannerism and demeanour will gradually follow.

As for the development of gratitude, bringing them to less developed countries will widen their horizons and enable them to be grateful for what they have. In addition, emphasise on the fact that the food that we eat does not come easy. Draw a flow chart and show them how challenging it is for others to grow, prepare and deliver the rice to us. Talk about the time and efforts put in by farmers, delivery drivers, retailers etc. - up till the point where the bowl of rice is placed on our tables.

Media also has a strong influence on children. Sometimes they learn undesirable movements from movies and their surroundings. Children are like a sponge, absorbing everything in their sight. Care should be taken to ensure that they think, talk and behave in the right way.

I hope my comments are helpful.

Warmest Regards,
Patrick

[chenwj]

Probably she will grow out of it. My niece was a little tomboy in primary school and has no interest in any things girly. Things changed in p6 when she requested to rebond her hair and preferred to wear skirts.

[adoreachild]

This is happening as your child is now staying at home, So when she will join school and come in contact with some other children, automatically she will change her behavior and style herself. So, don't worry about it. So, now you just spend more time with her, play with her baby toys, baby items and let her enjoy and you also enjoy her childhood.


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