In-law problems?
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Sigh…so many of us have so much frustrations on our PILS, MIL, SILS…some SILs they also played the role of DILs in their hubby family. So why they behaved badly to their sister in laws in their own family.
For the past so many years, i have endured with their nonsense, accusations that included all sorts of the unthinkable like ran all my DH money away with otherman , steal money from business lah, blah blah…so much so much more to mention…theres tears, anger and so deep is that hatred…
When one of SILs pregnant with her first baby, my MIL was worried that i may purposely made her miscarriage by perhaps shifting the furniture in their house (PILs house) or maybe do anything evil to cause her to miscarriage , MIL did not asked me and my DH back for dinner at their home since day one that SIL pregnant till she gave birth.OMG… This SIL did not even stay at the same household with them. Isn’t this crazy? If they had treated me good, why have to worry i will make her daughter miscarriage to this extent? If i am so so evil, i will not have endured them liao for years!
Whatever bad things that happened to anyone of them (PILS and SILS), MIL will blame me for causing them. Most of time , all those bad things that happened , I have no involvement at all . But PILs can come out with the most ridiculous blame just to have me shoulder all the bad things.
I used to think in a coward way that if I kept quiet , endure and they will not touch me anymore. But no i was very very wrong then, it was like a cycle. If too long the four din take medications, they will "action" again.
Now i am happy to be myself!! What "ran away all DH money with other man" pui!! Our marriage is still strong and happy and we have a girl. I knew i will never regret as i have learnt that on ppl that purposely cause misery to my life why i have to stay related with them? If they have treated me as a family member , will they hurt me? Will we purposely hurt our own family members ?
i treasure my peaceful life now. -
I dread to think of those 2…one loves to smoke and the other must have stout everyday. Not young chicks but in 70s. Hubby told mother to cut smoking…she told him she rather die. If she goes easily, then of course it’s no prob. What if she is down with serious illness? The cheapskate angmoh son-in-law eyeing their flat. Youngest son also eyeing. They can have my share of the flat, PROVIDED they take care of the ‘package’ all the way.
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Yah ning ning, some PILs are like that. They think they can abuse you by saying whatever they want. Then pretend they never did anything wrong.
Anway, so many quarrels recently over at my side. So sian! -
Wow…
Thank goodness I’m not the only one in this kind of situation.
I’m staying with my PIL and BIL currently.
Have tried to live together peacefully but it is seriously very tough to do so.
BIL is hopeless. MIL also gave me so much problems until my relationship with DH is falling apart.
Maybe because I was brought up differently, that why I cannot stand their way of living. Not greeting each other, using the common toilet with doors opened, eating loudly with one leg up on the chair, shouting all the time and using vulgarities frequently. FIL still not too bad, just that he drinks everyday which I’m ok.
And that’s just the tip of the iceberg.
Countless quarrels had happened and I’m really exhausted.
I can’t wait for my own place to be ready!!! -
PILs are not rude. Sarcastic and says things that you can obviously read between lines but at the same time like so friendly and innocent. Backstabs and tells lies behind you. Presents you with gifts on big occassions…
Poisonous snakes! -
In-laws will always side with their child (your spouse), regardless of how good a relationship you have with them.
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fifiyeo:
They are so nice infront of others but yet you know they are not treating you nice from the bottom of their hearts. :torchme:PILs are not rude. Sarcastic and says things that you can obviously read between lines but at the same time like so friendly and innocent. Backstabs and tells lies behind you. Presents you with gifts on big occassions...
Poisonous snakes! -
fifiyeo:
mmm, yes thats what they always do to me then, abused me and yes pretend it never happen or worse \"black face \" at me as if i am the one that was wrong.Yah ning ning, some PILs are like that. They think they can abuse you by saying whatever they want. Then pretend they never did anything wrong.
Anway, so many quarrels recently over at my side. So sian!
SIL somemore used to tell my DH do not believe me coz i am a \"Big Liar\" .....Me and my DH work together daily then oh..i lie to backstab her ...how? with my DH with me all the time and i manage to lie? i got better things to do then to take \"revenge\" on her. Crazy! As usual My DH ignored and told her not to be so “无聊”。Then we countdown, coz less than 15 minutes, the FIL would call first and followed closely by MIL's call separately to \"bomb\" us for \"bullying\" their princess. And if we defend ourselves, MIL will go into a crazy state, she will yell ,curse viciously over our life and cry loudly over phone. As usual, At this crazy stage, We do not need to reason with her anymore but remain silent, coz she will just continue to yell and cry without listening to you. If we chose to hang off silently first, she will complaint we rude. All these , all these all becoz of just only a single lie from that SIL to smear us.
Well, now i no longer have to go through all those \"yelling and cursing\" anymore. But even without me now, siblings still quarrel. The point is before our marriage, they also often quarrel.
But i have to confess here \"i will forever hate that SIL\", the hatred is so deep that i forever will not want to see her \"face\" for my remaining years. -
My MIL and SIL popped by sometime around my birthday (waiting to be included for some outing / treats?)... but instead, my daughter chided them for not bringing me presents and cakes, and always come empty handed, blah blah blah where is the present for my mommy birthday??? I would agree that my daughter can be very rude with them - but since they let her get away with murder, why do I bother being the bad guy? :imanangel:
So anyway, the following day, my SIL came bearing half a dozen of those sugar cream decorated cup cakes! :rotflmao: -
Ningning: Don’t hate and don’t be angry (not for too long, at least). Those two takes up a lot of space in our minds and hearts, and unfortunately, they are difficult to be contained - so it radiates and affects people that we love and care for. I will never like my MIL or SIL, but sometimes I just pity their behaviour and state. Hate is too strong, and hate will only eat into myself and make me unable to be the true person I am. So I put them in one corner… but they are not worth me compromising my true self. I try very hard to be positive and happy.
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