How to manage a child who refuse to go to school

[ChiefKiasu]

One trick which I learnt from my friend whom I think is a great daddy is the \"naughty corner\". If the kid is naughty, put him/her to face the wall and make him/her stay there. Ignore the crying and screaming. Just make sure they stay there until the sulking stops. Do this once or twice and the child will learn the concept: naughty = naughty corner.


Next time, just say \"naughty corner\" and the naughty behavior will magically stop. It generally works pretty well with my daughter :). No need to slap or scream.

[ZacK]

ChiefKiasu:

One trick which I learnt from my friend whom I think is a great daddy is the \"naughty corner\". If the kid is naughty, put him/her to face the wall and make him/her stay there. Ignore the crying and screaming. Just make sure they stay there until the sulking stops. Do this once or twice and the child will learn the concept: naughty = naughty corner.


Next time, just say \"naughty corner\" and the naughty behavior will magically stop. It generally works pretty well with my daughter :). No need to slap or scream.

Mine is the cane and it works fine ... My son can throw into tantrums that you would have thought that he has lost all senses :roll: ... Anyway... I'll start with a warning and if he still does not heed... Then the cane comes in... Usually a whip on the bum is all it takes ... Of cos after the caning when he has come to his senses... Must be followed by a hug and kiss

I know some parents are against caning or corporal punishment... But I'd rather rein them in now when they are young and teachable than for them to grow up out-of-hand.

I have read some other forums where they complain that their child just would not listen etc... I feel that parents cannot adopt the attitude that everything is ok and nothing will happen... For me, from the time my son knows how to walk...
1. He knows that the kitchen is out of bounds and he has never ventured into the kitchen with or without our presence.
2. Whenever he is in the car, he needs to be belted up in his car seat and seat belt cannot be released until the car is parked properly.

To date, I have not encountered problems in these two areas. I cannot reconcile the fact that I still see parents belted up driving and the kids are happily jumping about in the back seat unbelted :shock: In my opinion just waiting for a bad accident to happen :?

[jedamum]

I guess the title ‘uncontrollable child’ does not do the kid any justice when the situation cited merely refers to the difficulty to get the kid settled into a school setting. My personal view is that categorising the kid as being naughty (and henceforth exercise the naughty corner or cane) when he/she is just going through a stage of adjustment is uncalled for.

[ZacK]

jedamum:

I guess the title 'uncontrollable child' does not do the kid any justice when the situation cited merely refers to the difficulty to get the kid settled into a school setting. My personal view is that categorising the kid as being naughty (and henceforth exercise the naughty corner or cane) when he/she is just going through a stage of adjustment is uncalled for.

Haha yes of cos... The naughty corner or cane would only be used in the appropriate situations... Dun think we have any sadistic parents here since we treat them as precious little gems

[ChiefKiasu]

Good point jedamum! I have renamed the title to:

"How To Manage a Child Who Refuse to go to School"

My earlier note is to simply discourage ourselves from using physical force on children and to use creative ways to enforce discipline. Nothing to do with getting a child to go to school.

[chixchix]

thanks for the feedbacks… he has been going to school to 1 year now with my last maid…i got a new maid about 2 months ago…they do play with her…when my DH is not at home …there is no problem …he goes to school… but when DH is at home… he simply doesnt want to listen…and when he cries…he cries like someone has tortured him…uncontrollably for 10-15 mins…


My DH doesnt advise him to go to school …he is like " dont disturb my morning sleep…if he doesnt want to go…its ok"

[mintcc]

hmmm is there some change in school? New teacher? New classroom? He doesn’t like the teacher? It happens to my nephew. Settle down in school already by the teacher and class room change and the new teacher very bo chap him. Has been crying whenever he needs to go school for a few weeks now. So may be you can go to school with him and see what it is like in the childcare. May need to consider changing childcare.


Anyway, cannot let them get their way by crying. If they cry = no need to go school or eat medicine … then the next time they will know that they won’t have to do something as they cry lor. So for the next few times have to make him go even if he cries…

[Gmum]

[Moderator's Note: Topics merged.]


Hi All,

My gal 2.5yo now and she has been attending childcare for 6mths. Every morning when sending her to school, she tends to cry and reject joining the class. It is driving me nut. WHATshould I do and WHAT is wrong with her or the school? sigh.......

[tamarind]

There is nothing wrong with your girl. She is still very young. Most kids at this age still do not know how to socialize with other kids, so they do not like to be away from their parents or caretakers. It is more likely that she has separation anxiety, not that she is rejecting school. She prefers to stay in the cozy and safe environment at home.


Personally I think that if a very young child does not like to go to school or childcare centre, we should just keep her at home. I read somewhere that the child may feel that she has been abandoned in school, because she still does not understand that mommy will come back for her. This may have a negative effect on her when she grows up. It is best to send her there when she is older. I feel that 4 years old is a better age.

[ChiefKiasu]

One way could be to send the child for playgroups first instead of whole-day childcare. So they see it more as going for fun activities rather than being parked somewhere while their parents go off to some other places. You can slowly enhance it to whole-day childcare when they get used to the routine.