Why do children steal & how to overcome it?
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Hi Jeremy,
Don't be despair. Can fully understand the stress that u & ur family r going thru right now. Give ur child more time, things will work out fine eventually since u know the root of the problem. U may want to talk to his form teacher on his unhappiness at school.
Take care.
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Jeremy:
I think its a way he release his stress and unhappiness in school. Maybe you can try to teach him other ways of releasing stress/unhappiness. Since his problem now is the lonley issue, tackle on this, and naturally he would be a happy child in school.
We had a family talk earlier on, we asked him is he a happy child. The answer is no. he claims that he is always lonely in school no one eats with him during breaks. Other than that he is ok.
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My DS has on and off brought back stationeries which according to him, he found them in school. Most of them are used ones and when we ask him, he said he picked them up from the floor and forgotten to put them in the "lost and found".
There were times he said teacher gave him and when we prompted further, he admitted he picked the erasers/pencils/rulers and didn’t hv time to put it in the lost and found.
We hv often told him not to take things that dun belong to him and he said he knows but he forgot… So the 3rd time when he again brought back stationeries, we took away his privileges for that week.
Does yr child has this problem? Would be grateful if you hv any useful tips on handling this?
He never hv this problem before but since started P1, he start to weave stories and bringing stationeries home. -
Forgot to mention that we hv given him ample stationeries to bring to school. he is also rewarded with fanciful stationeries for his good behavior. So we are puzzled as to why he is still bringing things back. :?
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Stealing is a habit which they form in childhood when parents fail to reprimand the child for taking something that does not belong to him or her.
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Hmm, I think you should take some time to explain to him how things work. Example the bookshop owner works very hard to bring food to the table for his family etc. Sometimes, kids do not realise exactly what they are doing.
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I agree that kids sometimes do not realize what they are doing. The first and foremost thing to do is help the child to realize right from wrong. Help the child to learn about the important fact that we do not need to have and own everything we see and like. Forgive him/her. Do not judge the child but help the child learn from the mistake and NOT to make the same mistake again.
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Just to share, my bro stole toys from a friend when he was a kid. When my mom found out, boy did he get a painful lesson he will never forget. He remembers it till now and he’s already 40yo.
Moral of the story is, nip the problem in the bud with a strong and painful deterrent. It is not enough to just tell the kid that stealing is wrong! Never over-protect your kid or tolerate the incident just because "he’s still young".
Ris Low (the ex-beauty queen who likes to steal) has a mother who condoned her behaviour since she was little. So who’s fault is it that Ris has turned out such? I am sure her mom tried "telling" her not to steal right? That’s all her mom did…
Besides caning the kid, you should also have a long talk with the child telling him the consequence of his actions - jail, humiliation in the media etc. Iran even chops the hands off those who steal.
And try to buy them what they want if you can afford it. Some kids have the green-eyed monster syndrome and if deprived, can resort to stealing. You can delay the gratification by making them work hard for the item, but ultimately, you must buy them the coveted item. -
Don’t be too stressed about it, Jeremy. I stole when I was young too. I took a loaf of bread from the coffeeshop. Also some erasers and bits and pieces of other stuff from the provision shop. Since he has been caught in the act, that is humiliation enough. Reassure him that if he needs something, he can always come to you and discuss if he can buy it.
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the next thing is don’t harp on the incident anymore with the boy unless the problem continues.
certain amount of pride is useful
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