Extra Marital Affair

[buds]

A one-off sexcapade sounds more like a moment of folly… than an

extra marital affair. I dunno… EMA to me is something more personal
& definitely not one-time/one-off kinda situation and an ongoing
relationship. Here’s my sharings.

An old friend whom i met under unexpected circumstances happily
shared she was extremely happy. I questioned her happiness as to
assure myself that she had gotten back with her husband, since when
i last saw her, she shared that she was undergoing separation period &
going through divorce proceedings.

Instead she replied, "I’m pregnant."

I was naturally overjoyed cos to me that meant she and her husband
had really moved on together. But when i was about to congratulate
her, she said, "Aren’t you gonna ask me whose is it?" Shocked out of
my world, i was just open-mouthed. She answered her own question
and told me that she was carrying another man’s child and intends to
keep it… but that she has patched things up with her hubs. The other
man was her long-time crush. And also another friend of mine…

She said that there was no way she could be with that other man in
marriage cos he will never let go of his wife despite his many infidelities
with numerous women. So she was contented to carry the child in her to
bear his name.

She eventually gave birth and named the child after the other man’s pet
name (ie. nick name) and ended it off with her husband’s surname. Yeah.
Her husband does not know till today.

However, the other man’s wife (also a friend) knows. Despite her many
suicidal thoughts and depression, she brought herself back up and just
told herself to snap out of it, for that man was the only one she loved &
cared for, since they first got together. I’ve asked her why she cud take
him back despite being angry, hurt and so crushed by his promiscuity…
She answered, "He’s the only man in my heart. I cannot think of being
with any other man other than him. He is also the father of my beautiful
children. My perfect lover and my best friend."

Though the hubs has sworn off the EMA with that friend, we know he’s
having on-going relationships with others… still. Some married, some
not. Now that’s one long history of extra marital affairs which may nvr
end. He is happy with his wife now spending more time with each other
and all their children. However, his need for variety is still evident till
today…

I do not understand the selfish actions caused by husbands to hurt their
wives and their family, when upon marriage husbands have vowed to
care, love and cherish… it is just sad and unfair.

To all wives who have stood by their man, no matter what… and got
over it, you have my utmost respect with your magnanimosity and the
drive to keep moving forward, for it is definitely not easy… cos as women
i’m sure there will be lingering thoughts as to what went wrong and what
was done/had been done with the other woman/women.

Someone i know once said, "There are times when finding peace seems to
have better satisfaction than compensation…"

Fellow male friends… help us (women) understand you better instead of
seeking temporary exits… Women are generally easy to please if you
would only try…

Fellow female friends who’ve been through the despair of having an
unfaithful husband, here’s hoping you can find that profound peace in
your hearts.

My take is, upon marriage…
a husband and wife is only exclusive to each other and no one else.

Period.

[winth]

Wow, buds…


Have you heard of the club for swingers?
Swingers are married couples exchanging their sexual partner with other married couples for sexual flings. The logic to joining such swingers club is through the basic assumption that they are married spouses who do not visit prostitution houses, then they should be STD-free and less risk as compared to visiting a pro girl. Plus, it’s for free.

I got a shock of my life when I read about it in some women’s magazine. But it seems common in Singapore.

[winth]

buds:

EMA

What's EMA?
Is it a short form or some term that I should research for?

[buds]

EMA = Extra Marital Affair

[Honey]

winth:

Wow, buds...


Have you heard of the club for swingers?
Swingers are married couples exchanging their sexual partner with other married couples for sexual flings. The logic to joining such swingers club is through the basic assumption that they are married spouses who do not visit prostitution houses, then they should be STD-free and less risk as compared to visiting a pro girl. Plus, it's for free.

I got a shock of my life when I read about it in some women's magazine. But it seems common in Singapore.

Really? Common in Singapore? I always thot' it is a Western Culture thingie. Guess got to wake up to the real world outside man!

[winth]

buds:

EMA = Extra Marital Affair

OIC....
oops again.

[buds]

winth:

Wow, buds... Have you heard of the club for swingers?

Yes, I have.
It works like friends with benefits.

If husbands allow their wives to sleep with their friends,
what different would that make wives with prostitutes
themselves?

It's sick.

Like pimping your own wife so that you can get your flings.

[buds]

Most times, such flings come with strings attached.

Cause with variety, one will realise there will always
be someone better out there than what one already
has…

[3Boys]

buds:

I was naturally overjoyed cos to me that meant she and her husband
had really moved on together. But when i was about to congratulate
her, she said, \"Aren't you gonna ask me whose is it?\" Shocked out of
my world, i was just open-mouthed. She answered her own question
and told me that she was carrying another man's child and intends to
keep it... Though the hubs has sworn off the EMA with that friend, we know he's


having on-going relationships with others... still. Some married, some
not. Now that's one long history of extra marital affairs which may nvr
end. He is happy with his wife now spending more time with each other
and all their children. However, his need for variety is still evident till
today..

I do not understand the selfish actions caused by husbands to hurt their
wives and their family, when upon marriage husbands have vowed to
care, love and cherish.... it is just sad and unfair.

buds,
it would appear that infidelity is not the province of married MEN only anymore. Married WOMEN too seem to want their share of variety. One could say its a sign of gender equality................

I was reading today about how girls as young as 14 are participating in sexual activity, and indeed sometimes baiting the boys/men. As the current laws stand, the boy/man in this situation will be at a disadvantage.

Parents, its not just the girls you have to watch out for, you've got to make sure your boys are not taken advantage off sexually by girls too.

[winth]

honey:

Really? Common in Singapore?

Yup. Now that blogs and forums are so common, you get to see such terms around.

buds:

It's sick.

Like pimping your own wife so that you can get your flings.

Yap yap. But sometimes it's not only the husbands, wives dun mind pimping their husbands for flings too. Reports show that numbers of wives straying is almost equal to husbands liao.