The Birds and the Bees

[val]

Hi Luanee


I’d be alarmed too if my daughter said that to me.

First, perhaps examine how she gets such ideas in her innocent mind. Has the child been exposed to TV programs unsuitable for the kids… and I dun mean R21 ones… nowadays they have unsuitable themes in the prime time TV slots as well.

The latest Juhua (Korean TV drama at 7pm, channel U) K-wave show had the lead actor play up his anticipation of the wedding night with a lot of suggestive remarks and wink wink stuff.

When I tape new Jap anime cartoons for the kids (such as DGrayman), I will vet the shows for adult themes (such as Burst Angels) and not tape the ones unsuitable for kids.

When we tape movies such as 2 Fast 2 Furious (my boys like cars) off the TV, we watch it with the kids with a remote in our hands. When you can anticipate the kissy kissy scenes and when the actor/actress will start undressing and jump into bed is going to happen next… fast forward, ha, ha! That’s what we do lah.

Perhaps you cud just ignore her comments and take a wait n see approach. Sometimes, kids say certain things to get extra attention e.g. swear words. I doubt she will seriously really do such a thing. Maybe it was just said in jest.

But I have been teaching my 5-yr-old girl that some parts of our body is private, and to shut the door when changing (becos she has 3 older brothers), which she does remember to do so all the time. So she is already not inclined to want to appear undressed.

Hope it turns out alright for you.

[jedamum]

val:

First, perhaps examine how she gets such ideas in her innocent mind. Has the child been exposed to TV programs unsuitable for the kids... and I dun mean R21 ones... nowadays they have unsuitable themes in the prime time TV slots as well.

i totally agree. the recently Crimebuster x2 which ended its run in Channel 8 have one such scene whereby the girl said that she'll take off her clothes for the guy if she likes him. I stared at my K2 boy and then asked him 'like that can anot' and he gave me the disgusted look. :oops:
whenever i tried to shoo my boy away or distract him from the programmes when i anticipate such scenes, my boy get irritated cos he complained that i disrupt him from watching the whole show. :roll:

[Luanee]

Yeah I think TV is the main culprit. Not only the shows, the commercials also! There’s one on primetime (cant rem for what product) where it shows a shirtless guy kissing a girl on a boat or something like that and my girl will go Yeeks whenever she sees it.


I am sending her to an all-girls pri sch next year and hopes that she gets better sigh…

[val]

Personally, I wud not send my child to an all-girl or all-boy primary sch.


I was from a mixed pri sch, and then went on to an all-girl sec sch, and then mixed JC. Had no problem interacting with the boys in JC.

But I had a female classmate from the same all-girl sec sch (we were classmates there for 4 yrs), who went to same JC with me and we were in the same class too in JC. But she behaved very oddly from the first day in JC, so diff from the girl I knew in sec sch. She was painfully shy and quiet, extremely self-conscious.

After a few days during orientation, I cud not stand it any more and asked her what was wrong - why she was like that. She said she did not know how to behave in front of the boys - turned out that she went to an all-girl pri sch as well.

I thank my parents that I was in a mixed pri sch becos it took all the mystery out of boys - you know how naughty they are in pri sch. But I do think that pri sch is the best period to be in a mixed sch becos girl-boy relationship has not started yet (for most average pri pupils, that is. But there are always exceptions).

If you do send her to all-girl pri sch, hopefully not all-girl sec sch as well. May have to think a little further than the current pri level, and envisage future impact on yr child.

But of cos, not everyone may turn out to have the problem that my friend had.

Good luck!

[Luanee]

I was from a mixed pri school too and went to an all-girls sec school. A lot of my friends from all-girls pri school who went to my sec school didnt have problems when it comes to boys in JC or what, so I am not worrying in that aspect

[clarabella]

This is probably the same case:-

http://news.omy.sg/News/Local%2BNews/Story/OMYStory200905141537-61247/2.html

I have also heard of perverts taking pictures of little boys in bathrooms. :!:
Makes me worry incessantly whenever my older son goes to a public bathroom. He's too old now to go with me to the ladies, and family restrooms are not always available, or they don't even exist at many places. Headache lah.

[clarabella]

Insider, I think that's a great rule! Wish that my kids' school (kindy) enforces this. I know many mums are concerned when they see dads, granddads, security guards, school-bus drivers, delivery guys etc walk in and out of the toilet. Especially when the girls' toilet is adjacent and most of the younger girls don't even remember to close the stall doors and walk out still adjusting their undies :shock:

[winth]

This happened when we were in a bathroom tub during our Malacca trip last weekend.


PS: We bathe together (DH, me and 2 boys)

It was a rather small bathtub and our sitting arrangement was in such a way that we had to squeeze ourselves into the tub, sitting shoulder-to-shoulder, plus DH didn’t allow DS1 to control the taps for safety reasons.

So I sat in the middle, DS1 was on my left and DH on the right.

Then I noticed DS1 staring at my chest, and started to compare his with mine. I elbowed DH for attention so that we could both be prepared to give him some ‘model’ answers.

DS1: Mummy, why is yours like that?
Me: Oh, it’s because when mummy have babies, there will be milk stored inside and it will be useful when I breast-feed the babies.
DS1: Do I have milk inside too?
Me: Nope, not really.
DS1: You mean the milk is for babies? Who will give birth to babies?
Me: Yep. It’s for the babies to drink. The girls will be giving birth to babies? It will be stored inside my tummy (And I showed him my wrinkled abdomen)
DS1: Will I be having babies too?
Me: No, you just… (my sentence was interrupted by DH as I was about to tell him about sperms) No, you will not be the one to have the babies. It’s mummy’s job. (DH was whispering into my ear that we just have got to answer his question, and not go into the details)

It was really embarrassing.

But come to think of it, it might not be a very good answer that I gave him as he will think that breasts is just to store milk. Plus I dunno if I should tell him about his job to make babies.

What do you think?

[carebear]

Simple in my case.

Have 2 hamsters of different sex.
Kids witnessed the mating, the pregnancy and the birth of 4 hamster pups.
Also saw how mommy hamster nursed the pups until they were independent.

[soutv]

[Moderator's note: Topics merged.]


I have a difficulties to tell my kids about sex. Anyone can help?