Lazy & Low Attention Span Kid
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chic_savvy:
Hi there, I had the same trouble with my 4-year-old son when it comes to brushing his teeth and getting him to bathe.
When it comes to showering or even brushing her teeth, she would either take her shower very very late or forgets about brushing her teeth! I had to chase and remind her almost all the time! I really don't know what to do with her now as recently, I have also blew my top more often because of these. Tell me what I should do parents, I am at my end wits. :stupid:
At such a young age, I would think he's just starting to have a mind of his own so I try my best not to lose patience when he resists listening to me.
Then, I adopted to showing him the 'consequences' of NOT following my instructions. Like my husband had a bad tooth extracted so I showed him the extracted tooth with a big black hole.. I saw great horror on his face as I explained the reason of the black hole, not brushing his teeth before meals, in the morning and night etc. haha. And I took a foul-smelling t-shirt soak in prespiration for him to smell and explain that's what a person would smell like if he/she doesn't bathe for long.
This method works really well for me, at least for now. So every morning, the first thing he does is brush his teeth and he hardly resist a bath/shower ever again.
Just a suggestion.. then again, I'm dealing with a kid much younger.. do hope u share what works when u see a change in your daughter!
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Brownbear:
Actually, what you mentioned is quite a common issue amongst parents. The bad news is, motivation often involves emotional issues and is hence more complex to address. The good news is, it is actually possible to increase your child’s intrinsic motivation by identifying and removing mental-emotional barriers (sometimes conscious, sometimes unconscious), and improving self-leadership and resilience.My p2 boy is also slow and forgetful. And he is not independent and confident so always not sure what to do, when to do etc etc. How can I train him to be more focus and more confident? I find out I am always sitting next to him while he was doing homework at home. When I step out of him room, he will call me within 1 min 'Mummy, how to do this qs?' Really driving me nuts.
His big brother (sec 1) is a nightmare. He is having this 'can't be bothered' attitude right now. Marks are going all the way to the south and despite endless conversation with him, we don't see any improvements. How to talk/understand a teenager and motivate and encourage him? How to tolerate his mood swing and disrespectful and rebellious stage? Or must I wait till he is 'awake' so he will work hard? Some friends told me their kids only woke up b4 O-level, wow, how many more stressful years for me to go?
Having kids really is life long journey as I find myself learning something new (good & bad) everyday!
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I have no solution for u
I am in the same shoe or perhaps a worse shoe than u
My 9yo resume has gone south too
His attitude towards work is also getting fr bad to worse
He is very sensitive n tends to
Compare how I treat his bros vs how I treat him.
He talks back n purposely do The opposite
He can't focus in Sch n worse at home
He has no urgency (work , eat, brush teeth etc)
And yes, he is only motivated when it comes to play
Everyday I
Boiling n BP shooting up
I find it hard o love him
Now
I turn very stern when I speak w him n he will start to be annoyed
I dunno
What to
Do
His privatr tutors gave up on him
His twin bro is autistic
Could he have Add too -
Actually, what you mentioned is quite a common issue amongst parents. The bad news is, motivation often involves emotional issues and is hence more complex to address. The good news is, it is actually possible to increase your child’s intrinsic motivation by identifying and removing mental-emotional barriers (sometimes conscious, sometimes unconscious), and improving self-leadership and resilience.
<<Mod’s Note - self advertisement removed. Kindly do not turn this thread into your advertisement thread>>[/quote]
Thanks for the advice.
I understand all kids will go thru difficult stages, just some early and some later, and some very mild and some can be quite a headache to handle.
I try not to compare my two sons as I believe they have their own characters and their own strength and weakness. I accept who they are but of course, will nag/punish of their wrong doings.
I find out maybe I focus too much on their academic and neglect their character building and bonding etc. So I will try to balance it and build up their confidence and self-esteem. -
Actually, apart from my 8 year old daughter, I also have a 4 yr old son. I have tried this \"scaring\" method before at them but I would use the Google images instead to scare them off lol Such as horrible tooth decays images and stuffs.
There was one time last year, my gal 7 yr old then, for a period of time told me that she didn't want to be fat and always squeaked at the sight of food. I kinda freaked out becos at this age??? And it must have came from her school peers a.k.a \"winx club girls\" *roll eyes* to compete looking \"polished.\" Though I was quite mad but I had to educate her nicely. So I explained to her about eating wisely to look good and showed her anorexic pictures from the internet. That freaked her out lmao!woshistarfish:
Hi there, I had the same trouble with my 4-year-old son when it comes to brushing his teeth and getting him to bathe.chic_savvy:
When it comes to showering or even brushing her teeth, she would either take her shower very very late or forgets about brushing her teeth! I had to chase and remind her almost all the time! I really don't know what to do with her now as recently, I have also blew my top more often because of these. Tell me what I should do parents, I am at my end wits. :stupid:
At such a young age, I would think he's just starting to have a mind of his own so I try my best not to lose patience when he resists listening to me.
Then, I adopted to showing him the 'consequences' of NOT following my instructions. Like my husband had a bad tooth extracted so I showed him the extracted tooth with a big black hole.. I saw great horror on his face as I explained the reason of the black hole, not brushing his teeth before meals, in the morning and night etc. haha. And I took a foul-smelling t-shirt soak in prespiration for him to smell and explain that's what a person would smell like if he/she doesn't bathe for long.
This method works really well for me, at least for now. So every morning, the first thing he does is brush his teeth and he hardly resist a bath/shower ever again.
Just a suggestion.. then again, I'm dealing with a kid much younger.. do hope u share what works when u see a change in your daughter! -
Oh dear, please don't fret and give up. I know its easier to say than done but don't give up. Your kids need your support. I kinda feel you. I dunno why when I deal with other children (special needs) I could give all the patience in the world to assist them but to my own kids (who are normal), I just could not solve these petty problems myself.
redjazzy:
I have no solution for u
I am in the same shoe or perhaps a worse shoe than u
My 9yo resume has gone south too
His attitude towards work is also getting fr bad to worse
He is very sensitive n tends to
Compare how I treat his bros vs how I treat him.
He talks back n purposely do The opposite
He can't focus in Sch n worse at home
He has no urgency (work , eat, brush teeth etc)
And yes, he is only motivated when it comes to play
Everyday I
Boiling n BP shooting up
I find it hard o love him
Now
I turn very stern when I speak w him n he will start to be annoyed
I dunno
What to
Do
His privatr tutors gave up on him
His twin bro is autistic
Could he have Add too -
I am feeling stressed up again. My gal did the \"I forget\" and \"I don't know where my...\" It's making me mad fire! She was punished for writing lines, given some assessment work during her school holidays but all these were not complete. I got so mad with her, for the first time, I said \"carry on with this behavior, *I blurted out* \"You're hopeless!\" Slap me parents cos I know its so wrong to mention words like that. I mean, I've always believe negative words will hurt a child's esteem and I don't even say shut up (just keep quiet!) to my children but this time I really lost it. And out of desperation to find out why she is behaving like that, I looked into the possibility of ADHD. I read one of the subtypes of ADHD that is ADD or ADHD-I/PI (predominantly inattentive) symptoms suit her characteristics very much. Well except for losing focus in play but pretty much everything falls into place. I haven't ask her teacher in school if they notice any \"lagging\" behavior but the last time I heard and with her last year's feedback, she was well-behaved and usually quiet but plays well with her peers. ADHD-I symptoms have to be constant at home, in school and anywhere. If it only happens at home, then what is it? deviant behavior? or I'm already starting to find excuses for her behavior :stupid: *berserk* Perhaps I should really get her tested..
Copied and pasted from this useful site http://www.nativeremedies.com/ailment/child-add-symptoms-info.html
The following symptoms are common indicators of ADD in children:
Difficulty keeping attention on work or play activities at school and at home
Losing or forgetting things like toys, pencils, books, or tools needed for a task
Avoids or dislikes activities that require sitting still or a sustained effort
Seems disorganized and doesn't pay close attention to details
Has trouble with tasks that require planning ahead
Forgets things and is easily distracted
Does not follow directions or finish tasks, often skipping from one uncompleted activity to another
Does not appear to be listening when someone is speaking
Does not pay attention and makes careless mistakes
Is forgetful about daily activities
Has a tendency to daydream
Becomes easily distracted by irrelevant sights and sounds
Rarely follows instructions carefully and completely
Throws temper tantrums
To help recognize ADD, some of the symptoms that cause impairment must:
Be present before seven years of age
Be present consistently for a period of six months
Above all, the behaviors must severely compromise at least two areas of a child's life, such as school, home, or social settings. (click link above to read the whole article) -
Chic-savv, how? How is your girl doing? I think my coming 6 year old kid is also the same and the list you put on sysmptoms , my kid has some of it also. Don pay attention, likes to play and is disogranised, always cannot remember where things are, forgets what she learns almost immediately and doesnt listen to instructions … wah my low BP become high BP!
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Hi
I am facing the same problems as you. My 8 years old boy is also like this and I did send him for ADD test. Yes indeed his attention span on school work / home work is very short, even the school teachers / tutors complain but comes to play, his attention span is 100%.
His problem may comes from too much TV and computer games which I agreed. From young, he is allowed to watch & play as much as he wants. Thus he is not interested in school work as he will find it boring compared to interactive games & TV. This is also what the doctor says. So we stopped him from TV and games, limit to no more than 30mins per day. It does help slightly. Now we are trying hard to get his interest in school work in order to increase his focus on school work. We realised if he is interested, his attention span will increase even his behavior during lessons will be better.
He is not the kinda who is Afraid of Teachers... if he is not interested or convince, he don't really bothers about the teachers. <This is a real headache for the teachers to control him or get him to co-operate.>
So maybe you can try to figure out if your child is getting too much TV/Computer games time......
One thing for sure, motivation strategy does proves to be a long time solutions than scolding.
I had lose my temper and scolded him like a Mad Woman :stompfeet: . It's only able to control him for a couple of days, after that he is back to 'Square One....... U know what I mean.
I ,myself is also trying to figure out how to manage him and get his result to be consistent. He can failed his school spelling / test if he had no interest / not motivated in studies...... Sad to say our education system really SUCKS.... difficult to create interest......... -
Hi,
Reading through the above, i suspect my 5-yr old may have ADD.
May i know where do you send your kids for ADD test / assessment?
After assessment, what sort of treatment is provided / advised?
I have a colleague who told me her son goes for consultation and was given pills to help him (he is 13) concentrate in class. At home, he doesnt take the pills.
I am not into putting my son on pills at this young age; anyone with experience post ADD assessment / consultation and currently undergoing treatment, can share?
Does any mummies here think those Cognitive Development or Thinkerbox courses help in correcting this? Any sharing also most welcome.
Many thanks.
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