If you could, would you decide on a 3rd child?

[Tiny]

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schellen wrote:

If I know second child is \"him\" waaay before \"he\" gets conceived, then there will be no second child. Now, if you can guarantee that my second child will be a \"her\", I will be 70% convinced to have a second one immediately.
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hi, i am a busy working mum who dun have luxury time to surf net. However, recently will roughly check e new posting titles here which related. Thanks for all the important notes.

I have 2 kids and also thinking to have no 3 currently. The reason behing is because of family balancing. For gender selection,

I come across this http://choicebaby.com/.

haha but i think it is just 50-50 so haven visit the shop yet

[buds]

Tiny:

I have 2 kids and also thinking to have no 3 currently. The reason behing is because of family balancing. For gender selection, I come across this http://choicebaby.com/. haha but i think it is just 50-50 so haven visit the shop yet

Wuuaaah! There's a SHOP, people!!
Let's GO!

Niwae, now that the kiddies are bigger and am having more
time for myself and my husband than i had in years, its hard
to picture myself going back to the nipple in baby's mouth like
a buffet table 24-7 again... esp if its a BOY! Like schellen, i
prefer girls myself.. Let's not even go into the all-over-again
weight gain and other stuff too.

Now, its time to save more for the old days (start early),
kids education, set aside for (future, if need be) our parents'
medical attention, on top of other things... and just more
savings for the rainy days ahead. I suppose we'll stop at 2,
for now. More luxury for the kids and most definitely more
time to spend with them. May shortchange with a 3rd...

That being said, if there IS reali a 3rd one coming due to
negligence or accidents , we'll still accept with open
arms and lots of love, cos they're still god's gift to us.

Just my side of the sharing..
Cheerios!

[jedamum]

insider:

Mummies and daddies with two or more kids out there want to share the good-bad, bad-good, good-good, bad-bad, etc, 'computation' here?

Not actually bad-good or good-bad, but a very different experiences for both.
ds1-cranky baby; ds2-easy baby

ds1-sitdown and play baby; ds2-climb all over the place baby

ds1-listen to instructions todd; ds2-a mind of his own todd;

ds1-petty kid (can cry for hours over small issue/fall; difficult to pacify); ds2-rebounces easily (cry usually <3min and then all smiles; easy to pacify)

ds1-inflexible (cranky at change in routine); ds2-flexible (to any routine)

can say while my ds1 is a sensible boy, he is not a complete angel. and whatever is his 'bad' points, his bro makes up for it and vice-versa.

[buds]

Like your computation jedamum..

This means each child is different in his own way,
of the good-bad and bad-good, but make up for
each others \"bad\" with a special and unique good
they each have.. So, via this computation a 3rd child
should be a yes?

[ImMeeMee]

hello i have 3 girls aged 5 yo, 3yo and 20 months.


my experience is bad-good-bad - especially the last one could be hell at times …

my second one was good, considering that i could manage her well, and there were less occasions of frustration. good also that she was able to express herself and control her bladder and bowels by 2 yo.

so the computation seems different from the rest.

[jedamum]

buds:

So, via this computation a 3rd child

should be a yes?

hm...if the 3rd one turns out to be a girl, the idea of a youngest cutesy princess who is the precious darling of the dad and gets two elder bros to protect/give in to her...will it result in a spoilt little princess who can overthrow mum's importance in the household just by pouting to the dad?

[schellen]

jedamum:

hm...if the 3rd one turns out to be a girl, the idea of a youngest cutesy princess who is the precious darling of the dad and gets two elder bros to protect/give in to her...will it result in a spoilt little princess who can overthrow mum's importance in the household just by pouting to the dad?

I think that depends on how mom connects to her right from the start. And mom's expectations.

With my DD, when she was younger, she did get jealous if she saw me and DH cuddle or hug so we just didn't do it in front of her to cause less stress for everyone. Now that she is older, she doesn't get upset anymore. Maybe it's because DH is good in balancing his attention and affection plus she understands that we can share. She also has her other admirers (i.e., relatives) and her own social circle.

When DH commented that I was being too disciplinarian with her right from when she was baby and he spoiled her rotten (now no more due to painful consequences for him :evil: ), I just told him that if DD loves him more, I don't mind, so long as she also loves me. As she got older, our relationship got better since her thinking matured.

So jedamum, go get your little princess!

[winth]

[quote]If I know second child is \"him\" waaay before \"he\" gets conceived, then there will be no second child. Now, if you can guarantee that my second child will be a \"her\", I will be 70% convinced to have a second one immediately. Sorry to all those who will tell me that a child is god's gift, boy or girl also my child, should not have favourites, etc. When it comes to my kids, I discriminate. (Oh, no point trying to get sashimi and my DD to convince me otherwise cos we all think alike.))[/quote]
Hi,

I have heard of a cheaper method to make make out whether your next one is a boy or a girl. Free method!

Came from my ex-colleague who predicted the gender of my next child when I wasn't even pregnant with my 2nd child then.

She said you can go look at the 'whirlpool' at the back of the first child's head. Dunno what that's called in scientific terms, but you know there's this swirl-like thing at the back of our heads where the roots of the hair can be seen?

She said that, if it's in the centre (or so close to the centre), the next child's going to be a boy. If it's on the sides of the head, the next's going to be a girl.

So, when I saw my 2nd boy's whirlpool... It looks relatively centre. So I think my 3rd (if I'm having the next one) is gonna be a boy.

Before I got pregnant with DS2, I was really crossing my fingers and hoping for a girl and of course, hoping that my ex-colleague was wrong. Perfect ending mar... daddy-girl, mummy-boy attraction. Everyone told me it's a girl, from the shape of my tummy and how it tilted. After the gynae told me it's a boy, I wasn't too sad, but well... i was disappointed. When DS2 was totally different i.t.o character, as compared to DS1, I was beginning to discriminate against DS2 and felt that I shouldn't have, you know...

A year ago, I had my bazi read (ya... i'm the fortune telling type of mummy), he said that I have good relationships with my boys, simply bec they are boys. If it had been a girl, the relationship is usually sour. So well, you never know.

[winth]

insider wrote:

[quote]Mummies and daddies with two or more kids out there want to share the good-bad, bad-good, good-good, bad-bad, etc, 'computation' here?[/quote]

My elder one is quiet and boy of few words, independent, very good natured, studious and obedient. The only thing that I felt DS1 lacked was the courage to speak up in crowds as he's the silent type.
Oh... my second... bad temper, persistent, think he's gonna be a chatter-box when he speaks. And a show-off too. But surprisingly, it seems that he's very well-liked by the school-bus auntie and the todd-class teachers when we had the chance to talk. They've given him thumbs up and were full of praises on his 'behaviour (huh?), obedience (what's that?) and intelligence (wa...) 哇！你的孩子很聪明，很厉害啊！I was like :shock:

So I think it's a good-bad combi that we have here.

But we've always thought it's good for a change when DS2 grows up to be this way. It does add some spice into our otherwise boring family with obedient and quiet children.

When we were a family of 3, it just didn't feel that we balanced well. Somehow something was missing although DS1 was an angel (with some foul tempers though). Now when we go out as a family of 4, everything seems just right, with someone (DS2) to entertain us.

[corneyAmber]

Riding on this thread, for mummies and daddies, what would be the oldest age of yourself for you to consider to have your last child, whether it is 2nd, 3rd, 4th, etc…